An Internal Locus of Control

Part 2 or a 3 Part Series on Ethics

August 29, 2004

By Pastor Marcia Moret Sietstra

Jeremiah 2:4-7

Hebrews 13:1-8, 15-16

Luke 14:1, 7-14

A few weeks ago, I told you about a Catholic priest named Dr. Raymond Carey who is a psychologist and ethicist, and who I heard lecture on several days this summer at Chautauqua, NY. I talked about some of his ideas on ethics. Ethics is the study of right behavior, that is, how we live out our moral principles.

Today I want to continue this theme, first by telling a true story. When Ray Carey was a young teenager, his family moved to Oregon. Ray started running around with a kid in the neighborhood named Bill, who was living in a foster home. He was what they used to call a juvenile delinquent. One night at dinner, Ray’s mother said, "Ray, please do dishes with me tonight." He protested, "But it’s not my turn to do dishes." His mother said, "I know, Ray. I’ll make it up to you, please dry dishes tonight." Well Ray thought he knew what was coming—she was going to tell him he couldn’t hang out with his new friend. So he set his jaw and followed her to the sink.

As he began drying dishes, his mother said quietly, "You know, Ray, we’ve been so blessed. We have a family that loves each other. You’re lucky enough to have a great example in your dad, of the kind of man you can be when you grow up. Bill has had none of that. We owe it to him to be a good example of how to live a good life. I want you to invite him over anytime, so he can learn from our family." And so that is exactly what happened. When I heard this story, I thought of today’s text in Luke. At the banquet table of God, none of us is better than another, and we are all welcome.

If Ray’s mother had forbidden him to see Bill, he told us he would have been angry and probably met his friend behind her back. Instead his mother gave him a good reason to "be good"—and a hefty measure of good old Irish guilt if he wasn’t good! She was teaching Ray to reverence himself, to see himself as "good". To believe in oneself is a way we reverence God who created us.

We often see parents acting in just the opposite way…parents yelling at their kids at the mall, saying "shut up" or slapping a child in the grocery store. No wonder these kids are angry, and don’t grow up seeing themselves as good or capable. These kids are not likely to become adults who feel a sense of great responsibility to others. It’s tough to believe you can be of help to anyone else when you don’t feel good about yourself.

Let me ask you this question: Do you believe in your own goodness…do you reverence yourself? Or do you carry around a lot of negative stuff in your head and expect not to do well? If you heard a lot of negative stuff as a child, then you might be letting a "boo chorus" follow you around. If you were lucky enough to have a parent or mentor like Ray’s mother, who gave you lots of positive messages about your ability to be good and to do some good, then you are much more likely to expect to do well in life. This is called self-efficacy, a humble belief in oneself, and it is a great asset in life. It is also the way we reverence ourselves as God’s creation.

Another thing Dr. Carey’s mother often told her children was, "Your education is not for you. It’s so you can help others." So Ray learned to be a life-long learner. When computers came along, he figured he’d better learn to use one—if not for himself, then to make him better at his job as a psychologist so he could help others more effectively. He could have said, "I can’t use a computer," and missed out on all the opportunities that the computer offers. He could have blamed his lack of computer skills on his age, on his lack of training during his schooling, or he could have blamed some external force beyond his control. But Dr. Carey believes in taking control of his life and making conscious choices that will help him be more effective.

Not everyone takes this much responsibility for their own life. Some people have such a strong belief in fate or luck that they refuse to take control of their own lives. Some might hold God responsible for every single thing that happens in life. But couldn’t that be an easy way out sometimes? To blame external forces for every single thing that happens to you is to have an external locus of control. It is to see a force outside of you determining your life.

Dr. Carey told us about a roommate he had many years earlier who, when they first met, asked him, "Do you cook?" "Yes," said Dr. Carey, "I cook." "That’s good," said the new roommate, "Because cooking’s not my thing." "Wait a minute!" said Dr. Carey, "Eating is your thing and my thing, but cooking is only mine? I don’t think so!" Cooking is learned behavior and it’s a choice not to learn it. If you don’t know how to cook you can’t blame that on God or fate.

Here’s another example. If I develop heart disease, which runs in my family, I could blame God for giving me a lousy genetic code. That’s putting the locus of control in my life on an external force, because I’m saying I have no control, God has it all. But if I accept some responsibility for my own health, if I exercise and keep my cholesterol down and eat a heart healthy diet, if I look at what I’m doing to affect what happens to me, that means I have an internal locus of control. I realize I have some control over what happens and take responsibility for it.

People with an internal locus of control look within themselves and expect to affect what happens to them, so they tend to make more conscious choices and to not feel trapped. Now this is a mixed bag, since feeling good about your ability to affect what happens also pushes us to work harder. In fact, people with a strong internal locus of control actually tend to have more anxiety because they feel so responsible. But they also tend to experience profoundly deeper joy and a greater sense of accomplishment in life.

It’s ironic that Dr Carey’s research shows that people who believe they have little effect on what happens in life actually tend to worry less and live longer because they are resigned to whatever happens in life, with an attitude of "it was meant to be." But they report lower levels of satisfaction with life, and run a higher risk of feeling trapped and powerless, since an external force is always controlling their lives.

I think what scripture suggests to us is that we need a balance here that certainly includes an internal locus of control. While we realize that much of what happens in life is beyond our control, scripture suggests that we are responsible creatures called to make a difference, and to practice goodness. From the prophets of Hebrew scripture all the way through the teachings of the early Christian church, scripture is filled with the call to make choices about how we will live. All three of our lectionary texts this morning imply a capability and responsibility to make conscious choices about how we will live and to make the world a better place.

I do not believe we are simply victims of fate or luck or some detailed eternal plan designed by God before we were born. There are some texts in scripture that suggest such a plan, but there is a much stronger theme in scripture which insists that we are morally responsible. Here again, reason must inform our theology. If our creator holds us responsible, that implies that we are capable, for certainly God would not hold us responsible for choices that do not exist.

Are you operating from an external locus of control, drifting along and letting life happen to you? Or are you operating from an internal locus of control, choosing daily how you will affect what happens to you? Are you using all the capability God gave you? If you want to work on developing your internal locus of control, Dr. Carey’s mother’s advice is still good: Be an example to others, like he was to his delinquent teenager friend, because in being a good example you’ll build your self-worth while you practice being good. Keep learning; believe that your education is not just for you, but to make you capable of helping others. Use it to help others and one day you will discover that you are making an impact.

These are some things to ask ourselves, and to practice, as we are challenged to live ethical lives. May you be blessed today with the knowledge that you are good because you are God’s own creation, that you reverence God when you believe in yourself, and that you can affect your life positively by making conscious choices. Amen.