Ash Wednesday Meditation

First Congregational UCC – Sioux Falls

Combined Worship Service

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Rev. Jean Morrow

On the bookshelf in my family room is one of my favorite Christmas gifts from this year…a little 8 inch Christmas elf, all decked out in red and green, glitter and ribbons, wings tipped in gold.  His hat and his little elfy shoes are adorned with holly…and his twinkling blue eyes are all wrinkled up because the smile, hidden behind his beard, is so big. 

He looked on as I wrote this Ash Wednesday meditation, reminding me that as spiritually filling and fulfilling as Christmas is, there are other seasons with other spiritual longings and callings…longings to empty…to let go of…to be free of…to make room.

And so, here we are…gathered together this night…asked to leave the glow of Christmastide and Epiphany…the season of “What did you get?”…to enter a season of reflection, acceptance, repentance and reconciliation. …we are shifting away from “What did you get” to “What will you give up”…or, said another way, “What is it that you might let go of to make room for God?”

Whether it is Christian Lent, Muslim Ramadan, or Jewish Yom Kippur – virtually all religious traditions take time to reflect upon the human need for repentance and renewal…to set right what needs to be righted…and to forgive mistakes of past thoughts and deeds.  As a wise pastor once wrote, some form of self-denial is often the only way to achieve true and lasting fulfillment.

For Christians, Lent begins today, Ash Wednesday, the morning after Shrove Tuesday…a day known for its feasting, drinking, dancing, singing and celebrating. 

Historically, Shrove Tuesday was commonly called Pancake Day, since pancakes were traditionally eaten on the eve of Lent.  It was a way to use up the milk, eggs, and fat…which weren’t allowed during the strict days of Lent.  And so the church bell, which called people to confession on Shrove Tuesday, came to be known as the pancake bell.

A verse from Poor Robin’s Almanac, dated 1684, gives us insight unto the feasting:

But hark, I hear the pancake bell,

And fritters make a gallant smell,

The cooks are baking, frying broiling,

Stewing, mincing, cutting, boiling,

Carving, gormandizing, roasting,

Carbonating, cracking, slashing, toasting.

Well, as you might guess, all that feasting didn’t set well with our spiritual ancestors, the Puritans.  That much merriment would be too distracting to the importance of leading an honorable and upright life.  They did not believe that special seasons should be set aside for piety…but that reverence and ethical conduct should be maintained throughout the year. 

The Puritans, with their influence on Protestantism, is likely part of the reason why many of us didn’t experience the ritual of ashes in the churches we grew up in…or even the observance of Lent.  It wasn’t, as I recall, a season that was set aside while I was growing up.

On one hand, like our ancestors, I do think we have an appreciation that we have no need of special times for prayer or penitence…that can happen anytime…and probably should.  But, on the other hand, chances are …with our busy, busy lifestyles…that given no special time, we may find no time at all for prayer, reflection, confession and repentance.

Hillel, a Jewish contemporary of Jesus, once said, “Separate not thyself from the congregation and its concerns, nor postpone thought for thy spirit until the day of thy death.  Say not, ‘By and by, when I have leisure, I will care for my soul,’ lest perchance thou never find leisure.”

We hear Hillel loud and clear today, don’t we?  Tending to the needs of the spirit is not a matter of leisure, but of spiritual discipline.  He is saying, “If you don’t take some time to grow your soul, then you may find that you have no soul to grow.”

So, whether we use the term “Lent” or even recognize it as a prescribed period of 40 days, we need it.  We need this time of self-reflection, repentance, this time set aside to look deep inside and empty ourselves of that which is burdening our souls…letting go of those behaviors or habits that keep us from fully engaging in life.

The origin of the Lenten season lies in the 40 days and nights that Jesus spent in the wilderness following his baptism.  He fasted and prayed and wrestled with external demons…internal demons…and when that time of solitary reflection and wrestling was over, he came away strengthened in spirit, strengthened in his resolve…and prepared to begin his ministry.

If Lent is our wilderness experience, we who live quite a distance in time and culture from Jesus, we need to ask what is required of us?  What process might we anticipate as we wrestle the demons of our time? I would offer three suggestions for your consideration:  We must attune our souls to acceptance, repentance and reconciliation.

First, acceptance…and by that I mean the acceptance of the inevitability of death.  Tonight, those who choose will be marked with ashes as a reminder of our human mortality…for we bear the mark of death and dying whether or not we give it external expression in the form of ashes.  We will die.  We are dying.  And, when we accept that we are dying, perhaps we are given the gift of freedom to live more fully.

In writer Anne Lamott’s book, Bird by Bird, she tells of sitting with her best friend, Pammy, who was dying of cancer.  Lamott went through a range of emotions that all of us who have been in similar circumstances have experienced:  helplessness, depression, anger.  In an effort to try to do something, she made an appointment with Pammy’s doctor…and he said the most surprising thing:  “Watch her carefully right now, because she is teaching you how to live.”

Lamott reflected later:  “I remind myself of this when I cannot get any work done: to live as if I’m dying because the truth is we are all terminal on this bus.  To live as if we are dying…time is so full for people who are dying in a conscious way; full in a way life is for children.  They spend big round hours.  So, instead of staring miserably at the computer screen trying to will my way into having a breakthrough, I say to myself, “Okay, hmmmmm, let’s see.  Dying tomorrow.  What should I do today?”

There is something about accepting the limits of life that makes the living of it all the more precious, and once we fully recognize each precious moment and the possibilities those moments hold for us, we are empowered to also accept the freedom to make different choices about how we live…to live more intentionally.

Once we are empowered to accept the freedom to make new choices, I believe we long for an opportunity for reflection and repentance…a chance to good long look at our lives…to figure out where we are right now…to examine our sinfulness, our wrongdoings, all of the ways we separate ourselves from God, from each other…all the ways we separate from being our best selves…we want the chance to change our ways if that is required, and get ourselves centered with God and be about the business that God would have us do…to fill our lives with the fullness of love.  We long for an opportunity to recognize and release ours souls from that which keeps us from being filled with the fullness of God. 

It is only when we take a good long hard look at our sinfulness and our brokenness that we can release it into the love of God…and that is where it belongs…that is where it can be transformed…that is where we can be transformed…because that is how good God is…present and waiting to lift and accept the burdens we carry…and replace those burdens with love and promise and freedom.  It is then that we are truly at home with God…and in right relationship with each other…and at peace with who we are. 

To live fully each day filled with God’s love…that may be the definition of reconciliation.

Hmmm…you know, with love and wholeness and reconciliation as the destination of the season, the next 40 days might not be so bad after all. It will take spiritual discipline to open up that completely…to open up the tender and broken and hurting places…to open up those deeply protected places that might embarrass us or make us uncomfortable…but we must remember that we do it in the presence of a loving, ever-present God, from whom we came and to whom we will return…a God whose love has been with us since birth and will stretch out into eternity…with us always.  When we think of the God’s promises that we will have life…and have it more abundantly, doesn’t the  spiritual work of the next 40 days sound exciting?

In a few minutes, you will be invited to engage in the ritual of ashes and take your first steps into the wilderness of Lent, with all its challenges and promises.  May it be a season about accepting the freedom of your mortality, of making things right, of opening your hearts, of seeking forgiveness and giving it.  May it be a season of turning around, turning away from sin and turning towards God.  May it be a season of reconciliation…with God, with each other, with friends, with enemies and with yourself.  May it be a season of making room for God’s love, drawing it closer and sharing it abundantly.  May it be so for you and for me.  Amen.